Just some stuff I thought about (PM)

I am absolutely the wrong person to ask about what one can and can not say regarding the Paralympics. 

I can't even talk about the most benign of topics without saying something questionable, so this is kind of a minefield for me. I'm just going to stick to the facts.

a) It is a fact that simply reading about the lack of punchlines in the Mooney/Pang/Zwar paralympic commentary makes my comedy balls ache so much I feel like I am going to have to watch some internet comedy before I can continue with this day. 

b) It is also a fact that a member of the wider Miss Soft Crab community is ON THE AUSTRALIAN PARALYMPIC TEAM IN CAPITAL LETTERS!

It's true!

This is her. She is a friend of Midbro and Lady Midbro. She is a swimmer and is short-statured which I am delighted to advise is the approved term. Apparently she competes in the next few days and is a dead-set medal chance. 

That's all guys. Nothing to see here. 

Just some stuff I thought about (AM)

Have you watched any of the Paralympics? Um... it's awesome. Even though I had access to a 3D TV during the regular Olympics, I actually hardly watched any of it. A bit of diving, some marathon, gymnastics (floor routines) but all that probably added up to about 45 minutes for the whole thing. And what I did watch I mostly watched in 2D. Boring. Maybe that was the problem.

I think I am already at the 45-minute mark for the Paralympics and it's only a few days in. I guess it's because anyone can swim 50m, and you can watch that on TV pretty much any time, but have you ever seen someone swim the length of a pool without arms?!? Or THREE pool lengths with half arms? I am not a great swimmer, and swimming 150m non-stop is tiring for me - I mean exhausting. Last night I watched an Australian swimmer swim 150m and brother only had half arms and legs. Can I say that? I don't know what I am allowed to say or not about the Paralympians. Shit, I don't know.

You know what is weird though? ABC have this nightly show of the day's highlights with a panel of comedians: Lawrence Mooney; Sam Pang; Adam Zwar; a sports reporter called Stephanie Brantz who I guess is the straight guy.  I think it is meant to bring a bit of levity to the whole affair. And probably to attract more viewers. But on Saturday night I saw a bit of it and Lawrence Mooney was talking about some chick who was crushed by a horse, her dad just died of cancer, some other bad shit, none of it funny, right? And yet, it seemed so bad and unlikely and coming from the mouth of a comedian, I was basically just waiting for the punch line. There wasn't one. So basically it's just hours of comedy blue balls of the worst kind. Constant unintended set ups with no punch lines about Paralympians. Is it just me or is that kind of... weird?