Fragmented Friday (AM)

TGIF, right guys?

It's been a hella busy working week and I am super excited it is about to end. Plus, this weekend is going to involve a range of fully sick things including:

• sleeping in 
• yum cha
• dinner with Crimpy, Blephanie and Legsly
• lunch with Le Flav, Neville and Giusep
• hanging out with J (just because we write a blog together doesn't mean we don't hang out...we totally do)

And they're just the things I've organised so far! I really want to get on with it so the sooner I can get this work business out of the way the better!

But first, lets get our Miss Soft Crab on, shall we?

So as you may have noticed, this post is called Fragmented Friday. Not because I am trying to introduce another day to the MSC schedule,  just because I have a bunch of different things I want to talk about and therefore the post will be kind of, you know, fragmented. Plus, I love an alliteration.

First thing

The other night I had dinner with AB, Chambo and CoCo and a funny thing happened. AB, who is pregnant, pretty much couldn't eat anything the last few times we went out because being pregnant has made her want to vom all the time. This was very confronting for all of us, because eating is AB's raison d'etre, and seeing her go off food made the whole world seem topsy turvy.  But happily, at our meal the other night, I was delighted to note that AB is well and truly back on from. Consider this:

This picture shows the remnants of a dish of strawberries,  balsamic vinegar icecream and meringue that we all shared for dessert. AB had all been going at this pretty enthusiastically,  but at this point, at the exact point that all that was left in the bowl was a couple of bits of meringue and some strawberry juice, AB said "whoa, I'm done, you girls can finish the rest of that".
HAHAHA.
Oh, AB.

Second thing
The following is a transcript of a conversation I overheard between two women in the kitchen at my work.

Lady 1: Wow, I like those shoes.

Lady 2: Thanks, I LOOOOOOOOVE these shoes.

Lady 1: .............

Lady 2: Would you believe me if I told you they were eleven years old?

Lady 1: Yes.


HAHAHAHHAH.


Third and final thing
 
This:

HAHAHAHAHAHA

I share your hair fail

OMG, mate was it THIS straightening product you bought? The one with 50 times the safe level of formaldehyde in it?! I think you should stay away from hair straightening products mate. But I understand why you were tempted.

You know, after your original grooming post, I thought I would try to do a little hair specialness myself. I tried to recreate the hairstyle that I wore for AB's wedding. Here I am in the hairdressers chair, getting it done.

I really loved that hair style. People complimented me on it all night, so much so that I started to think that my hair must look really fug most of the time, because there was genuine surprise in most people's compliments. Anyway, it was an awesome hairstyle and it took the hairdresser all of five minutes to prepare. Five minutes! That's nothing, right? I couldn't help but think that if it was so easy for him, perhaps I could do it too.
The other day I tried.
It ended up looking like this.
I can't do it guys.

A tale of two mexican dinners

Quite coincidentally, J and I found ourselves at two separate Mexican dinners last night. We thought we would compare them on Miss Soft Crab today, though not in a competitive way. Just because.

Let’s begin with the Mexican dinner AB cooked for Lil, Chambo and I.

Menu

AB served chicken burritos with buttered corn and chunky guacamole.

She also made sangria, but after having a sip of it told us we weren’t allowed to drink it because she feared that the special sangria wine she used to make it had turned. (I had a sip and thought it was fine, but didn’t argue because I didn’t want to look like someone who can’t tell when wine has turned.)

The burritos were delicious. It was the buttered corn and the chunky guacamole that did it. The corn had been char grilled, then the kernels removed and butter stirred through. We spooned it in to our burritos along with all the other delicious things you would expect in a burrito – cheese, sour cream, jalapenos, salsa, lettuce and guacamole. The guacamole had chunks of avocado instead of mushed avocado, tomato, coriander and lots of green chilli and lime juice. It was a real winner.

The first burrito I constructed balanced the different ingredients perfectly. I congratulated myself on every bite.

I guess I got a little cocky, because the second burrito was basically stuffed full of so much stuff that I couldn’t wrap the tortilla all the way around without delicious things oozing out either end. I soldiered on, but didn’t take a photo because it probably looked pretty gross.

Interesting conversation

The topic on everyone’s lips was dentistry. It all began with the discovery of a bunch of what AB called Piksticks in the drawer of her coffee table. These things are like tiny bottle brushes which you shove between your teeth to use instead of dental floss. AB raves about them, and likes to keep them in the drawer of her coffee table so she can maintain dental hygiene while watching television.

She invited us to try them for ourselves, but recommended we select carefully as some of them are definitely used. In the cold light of day this invitation seems so unappealing, but last night it seemed like a good offer and I can cheerfully report that Piksticks really do work.

Sadly, it was too late for Lil who told us that she was in the process of getting a root canal. Readers, getting a root canal is a three stage process that involves removing the nerve, drilling a hole then filling the hole. WTF. Lil has just completed stage 2 – drilling of the hole. Apparently the dentist had to up the size of the drill-bit three times. *Shudder*

AB advised that she too had spent a great deal of time in the dentist’s chair of late, having her canine teeth rebuilt. We all looked at her blankly. “Because of all the grinding” she said. She thought our blank looks were because we didn’t understand why she needed tooth rebuilding, not the fact that you can get your mother flipping teeth rebuilt. Ha!

Turns out AB grinds her teeth in her sleep and had ground her canines down so much they no longer had any pointy bits on them. These days, dentists can replace lost pointy bits. Isn’t that incredible? AB doesn’t think so. Apparently her dentist rebuilt the heck out of her canines, so much so that her chewing motion was impeded. Anyone who knows AB also knows that impeded chewing motion absolutely will not do, so she went back to the dentist and told them to fix it. I understand that tooth filing was involved. *Shudder*

Despite the talk of dentistry, we all had a lovely time. Thanks AB.

Science and Nature: two of the all time greats

I took your advice and looked at all of the photos on that website. You are right, they really are quite incredible. Now I have a slightly blown mind, not just because there was technology available in 1909 to take colour photos, but also because of how verdant and lovely Russia was in 1909, and how strange it is to see these people who were about to live through revolutions and wars just standing in a forest looking at the camera. Old photos always make me feel a little funny so that's not very surprising I guess.


But back to things that blow minds.


Unlike you, I basically try to avoid thinking about how things work because I take about two steps down the path of discovery and bam, my mind gets blown. As a result of not knowing how anything works, I am quite impressed by most things. And even if I am not that impressed, I am very pleased. For example, most mornings when I get in the shower, I can't help but have a little smile over the fact that hot water is piped in to my house and I can access it any time by turning a tap. Now this is a system I understand, so it doesn't impress me per se, but it certainly pleases me.


But another thing that happens most mornings impresses me a great deal. I have an African Violet plant in my bathroom that AB gave me as a thank you present when I looked after her dogs one time. I wish I had a photo of it here because it is a real beauty. Here is a photo from the interweb so you can get an idea. Mine is pink though.


So lovely. Anyway, AB propagated this plant from a single leaf. I know, it sounds crazy, but that's how it's done! You cut off a leaf from an established African Violet, then you place that leaf in a pot, and a whole new plant grows. Here is a picture from the interweb so you can get an idea.

I guess the big leaf at the back is the original leaf and those little green ones at the front are new leaves. Isn't that incredible! I just find that so incredible! Once upon a time my plant was just a single leaf. And now it is a big plant with many leaves and many flowers, flowers that look sparkly in the light! Every morning when I look at my African Violet in the bathroom I just think WOW.

So lets hear it for science AND nature, shall we? Hooray!

the abject and the abject

I love eggplant. I love it so much. The way it gets all caramelly and delicious. Shit, I love it. I love mushrooms too and so I guess what I am saying is that the eggplant and mushroom thing you ate is very, very appealing to me.

You know what is not appealing to me. A caesarean. I just can not come at asking someone to cut me open. To be perfectly honest birth au naturel is incredibly unappealing to me also. Oh god. I mean that shit is super, super painful. Traumatic in fact. Ugghhhh. Really traumatic. But still I would go with that whenever possible. I think. Now. That I am not actually facing that decision. I hope Lil does some good research before making any decisions, cause I'm pretty sure that epidural is a very common anaesthetic for caesars too. I guess the fact is that no matter how you do it, some pretty unpleasant stuff is going to have to happen for you to get your baby out.

And while I guess I should now address the royal wedding I just feel like I can't go on without addressing that total gross out by AB. Dude, that is some gross shit. But I guess I am kind of impressed by her dedication to food. I mean I thought I loved food. I don't like to see anything go to waste. I'll eat the food off another person's plate. But out of someones mouth! As Chickpea said to me recently, "gross me the fuck out!" And also a little bit, "word!"

So LB asked me the other day if you were coming over to watch the royal wedding. I was all, "What do you think this is, the Oscars?!" Surprisingly, I have no problems missing this wedding. I think a run down and some pictures tomorrow are going to satisfy me. Even though I do kind of love the Prince, especially since LB's mother met him recently. Yep, my mother-in-law (sans law) was talking to the Prince. See!

The elegant and the abject

Here is the wrap up from last night's dinner with Lil, AB and Chambo at Izakaya Den.

Lil is pregnant
This, we already knew, but it was our first dinner as a foursome since she broke the news so we had a little celebration. Apparently she had been to the obstetrician today and the matter of whether she would like a cesarean or a vaginal birth was discussed. Lil advised that she is considering both, but wants complete assurance that if she had a vaginal birth they could give her an epidural that would last the whole time, and that it would be totally pain free. This from a woman who has a pathological fear of injections. We explained how epidurals are administered. I told her that my Mum reckons that the needle they put in her spine was the size of a pencil. When I was little and would hear this story, I always imagined that the pencil would be massive, like this.

Lil went quiet. AB noted that she never really thinks about the pain when she thinks about giving birth. Lil said "I do. I think about it all the time. I don't want a bar of it. Haven't you ever done a really big poo? It kills!"

AB said "I know, but then you feel so relieved."

We ate this delicious eggplant and mushroom thing

I don't know exactly what was in that orange topping but it was nice and spicy. The dish was served cold, in that good way.

Chambo advised she wants total privacy to watch the royal wedding
Chambo is going to her Mother's house to watch it so there will be no distractions and she can totally focus. Those Chambos love the royals. I think Mrs Chambo even met the Queen once. Anyway, she asked us all what we were doing.
I casually advised that because Pickle and Minderbinder are having a going away party tonight, I wouldn't be watching the royal wedding. I hadn't said that out loud to anyone and as soon as I did, I realised how badly I wanted to watch the royal wedding, and how disappointed I am to be missing it. I kind of love the royals a little bit. Its my dirty shame. As is the fact that I like to watch movies like Eat Pray Love at the cinema, and get really disappointed when I miss them and have to watch them on DVD. Anyway, no royal wedding for me. Such is life, as the tattoo on Ben Cousins' stomach always says. I'm sure I can just watch the replay on Saturday.

AB did a gross thing
We ordered the ox tongue, which was served in thin, matchbox shaped slices topped with finely shredded spring onion. Lil looked a little queasy when the waitress said it was ox tongue. This is very unlike Lil, but I guess she is pregnant. AB, Chambo and I dove in and sure enough it was super yum. Have some! We chanted to Lil while shoveling more of it in to our mouths. Lil timidly picked up a slice and placed it on her tongue, then closed her mouth as if to chew. I guess she had a change of heart, because straight away she leaned forward and spat it out on to her plate. We sat there in silence for a second or two because that's not something you see every day. Then AB stretched out her chopsticks, picked up the discarded ox tongue and popped it straight in her mouth. Girl hates to see good food go to waste.