Oh my god you guys! Can you believe we're back here?!?
You know, when Miss Soft Crab went on indefinite hiatus a couple of years ago we thought we may see you back here one day. As K said at the time, "I'm sure there will be things that happen to us, with us, to all of us, that we'll need to come here to discuss. Maybe when we go to Jamface. Maybe when you/we dye your/our hair blonde. Definitely when QEII, well, you know." Thank god QEII has not, well, you know. And we never got to Jamface. And I haven't gone blonde. Although K kinda did. I think it's safe to say that we did not imagine that a global pandemic that was changing the way we all live was going to be the thing that ended this hiatus. But it is.
I mean, these are crazy times. Today AWOL emailed to say he had pneumonia and not coronavirus as he at first suspected, and I responded "Great news!" I mean the guy has pneumonia FFS!
A lot of other unforeseeable things happened too. Casey Affleck, a much loved MSC hunk, seen below in our last post, was revealed as a sex pest :( Ewan McGregor left his wife for another woman, so did Jimmy Bartel. Let's just say the Miss Soft Crab hunks have disappointed us. But let's just hope that in these crazy times, we don't forget to appreciate hunks. I mean, I don't think any of us could have imagined the winning combo of Brad and Leo gracig our screens and basically all media non-stop for about three months last year. And I for one couldn't be happier about that development.
Another MSC favourite, QEII, has had a lot going on too. Prince Harry married Meghan Markle and essentially left the royal fold, and there's the whole Prince Andrew thing. Ugh. But I feel like she's really embracing these difficult time. I mean look at this amazing outfit.
So, here we are. Yes, we're going to talk about this weird fucking thing that is going on in the world. But we're also going to talk about all the things you've come to love us for. Hunks! Clothes! Food! Our hair. And a bunch of other stuff we thought about. We're back. And it feels pretty bloody good! *Obviously you can't actually get out of town
I thought I was going to tell you today about all the near misses and dud aspects of my weekend which was a real roller coaster. I was going to tell you about all the disappointing meals I ate and the stories that I thought were going to turn out great but ended up shit (including, but not limited to said disappointing meals). But I'm a lover not a fighter and who needs to start the week off like that. And in fact mostly my weekend was really nice.
On Friday night we went to the pub for Minderbinder's birthday. And it was so nice to go to the pub and see people and eat a yummy burger (though not the disappointing "chips". Ugh. Regrets - I've got a few). And for a gal that doesn't get out much all I need is 2 hours, a few nice people and a beer to feel like I'm doing something. Doesn't hurt that I rounded the night out watching Graham Norton which at first seemed somewhat, though not entirely boring (Kevin Bacon, Jessica Chastain and Dianne Keaton as guests) until Norton brought out a late comer, Michael Fassbender! Who was not only his regular handsome smiling and delightful self but added some break dancing to his visit. THIS was followed by the GORILLAZ and the show ended with DAMON on the couch. Now sure, I'm talking about Graham Norton's couch, not my couch, still, I think as far as TV viewing goes, I couldn't ask for much better. To round this all out Noel Gallagher performed with Gorillaz. On Saturday I excitedly tried to tell LB about Noel and Damon on stage together but he just looked as me as if the nineties had never happened and when I tried to explain the Blur vs. Oasis saga of the heady days of Brit Pop he told me, "Yeah, I know who Oasis is, 'What's the morning, morning glory' right?"
On Saturday I had a really nice day spending some with my children leaving them with my parents and walking the streets of Armadale and Prahran and despite ending up busting and then having to use the worst toilet in Prahran
and another disappointing eating experience all the walking and sunshine and lack of external demands was really invigorating.
Yesterday I took Newbie out for breakfast. Even though I spend bulk time with him, Little Bean is always with us and our schedule revolves around Baby, even in his absence, so it was pretty sweet just to go out together, have a 'cino, read some books, eat an entirely, almost overwhelmingly, satisfying meal (mouth watering thinking about it now - it was the smoked creamed corn at Mixed Business if you're in the market for a great breaky). And after that great meal it almost doesn't matter that I spent most of the day prepping a dinner I expected to be fantastic but was a complete fucking failure (potatoes aside - which barely counts because they are almost unruinable). From mains to dessert it was all a disaster and a pretty disappointing way to end the weekend I guess. But that's life, right? You win some you lose some and I think that the past weekend was basically a metaphor for life.
Last night K and I went out for pizza. We had one with cheese (allegedly - Mate, do you think there was cheese on it? I feel like there wasn't. Not that I care) and the other one had no cheese.
So look, I probably didn't have cheese dreams. But I did have a dream that Ewan McGregor came over for dinner. He was just as handsome in dream reality as he is in the movies.
(PS. When I was searching online for this picture I learned that a hoax report of Ewan's death recently spread like wildfire. Thank Christ I missed that. I was distraught enough at the speculation of Prince Phillip's death yesterday. Hoaxers gonna give sister a heart attack!)
Remember how on Monday K was all 'Hell, we don't want to start this year off on a negative note!" And on Tuesday I was all, "Accentuate the positive!" And then yesterday K was all "I love Leonardo!" Well, fuck it I say. It's already Thursday let's just call it and say this is Hunk Week. Could there be a better or more fitting way or Crabbier start to the year. Nah-uh.
Thinking about those past Oscar nominees actually got me thinking that if Heath were alive today and had continued to be as awesome as ever he'd probably be my favourite hunk. Certainly he is one of history's finest hunks.
But although I can probably say Michelle Williams' Oscar look here is my all-time favourite, can I say Heath is my favourite hunk ever? I mean he was hot, special. Hot. But hotter than all others?
What about Ewan? I think I love him more than any hunk ever. He's practically the backbone of Miss Soft Crab, or the exoskeleton.
What about Damon?
Shit, he's as confused as I am! I think in their own ways their each my number one hunk. I just have a lot of categories. Like the Oscars. It's reasonable.
I guess it's like movies, books, songs. I mean so many times a song will come on the radio and I'll think, "This is THE BEST SONG!" But then if it came down to it would that really be my favourite ever song? I guess I feel the same way about hunks. I just can't pick a favourite. But what a great problem to have.
I'm sorry to hear you have that fancy sounding sore hand, but frankly it couldn't have come at a better time for me. I'm sick too! I have some tummy complaint that makes me feel like I'm going to spew and had me forcing LB to hold my hand at 5 o'clock this morning and listen to me cry about how sick I felt. I am basically bed ridden too. Couch ridden really and I'm certainly neglecting my motherly duties, particularly those that involve feeding my children because the sight of most foods exacerbates the spew feeling. Despite this I haven't even spewed which I feel thankful for, but do wonder if it would just get rid of this devil inside.
Lucky Ewan is always good for what ails ya.
Anyway mate, I hope you get over your Cuervo Gold disease soon.
I KNOW! Just my luck. It makes using my thumbs quite hard, and now that KB is here and I haven't sat in front of a computer for three months, thumbs are essential for MSC.
I suggest you guys spend the time you would have spent on MSC thinking about Ewan McGregor.
Sometimes I read old Miss Soft Crab posts. Usually because I want to see if we have already written about something, or what we have said on a topic. Sometimes because I see an intriguing tag that I can't remember and wonder what it relates to, sometimes just because I know this blog is really funny. Anyway on one such trip through the MSC archives I saw some pictures of Gael Garcia Bernal. Broadly speaking, they looked like this.
Hot!
And you can imagine what a pleasant surprise it was. Of course he was a Hunk of the Month so I shouldn't have been surprised to see him, but I guess it just really brought home the hunk recession we are living though. I know we have talked about it before but I guess I felt it was time to revisit the sad state of affairs and reflect on some of my thoughts on hunks over the past year. A year in which this blog, a blog with 49 posts bearing the 'hunk' tag only had 7, SEVEN hunk-tagged posts.
So, the year in hunks. What are my thoughts?
1. I guess the first thing to acknowledge is that despite some early questions, I am pretty sure that Chris Hemsworth is a hunk. Not quite A-grade, but certainly not B-grade. Like A- I guess. Shall we double check?
I guess the thing that confirmed it for me was that although I had wondered if I just thought he was hot because he was Thor, the ads for Rush confirmed that he was also quite hot as James Hunt, so you know, I guess the guy really is a hunk. Phew, sure am glad that question got answered!
Hot!
2. The hunks of my youth really came back into focus for me. Maybe it was because The Great Gatsby put Leonardo DiCaprio to the fore, but I really felt like this year I could move on from the 2010 puffy Leonardo to just kind of respect and appreciate him as an actor and some kind of hunk. Not a phwaor kind of hunk, something more subtle than that. A guy who has a special spot in my hunk heart. Even Ben Affleck managed to overcome, to some extent, his mid career follies (Bennifer, Pearl Harbour, that smug smirk he has - an ongoing problem really). I guess it as if, disappointed by their aging and revelations of them as possible douches, I rejected early hunks as if broken hearted, but now I've matured, they've matured, and I think we can finally be friends.
Yeah, over here at MSC HQ things are pretty rough. Though you need to understand, dear readers, that context makes the feelings that K and I are feeling slightly different. But it's fair to say things are rough all over. I totally understand why K wants to lie around moaning like an Italian Billy Crystal, but me, I'm in a position where I feel like I can stoically walk around just feeling like that knife block that looks like a guy full of knifes.
Or like this. Another way to describe it is like Ewan's face right here.
But bear with us guys, time makes major metaphorical stab wounds heal.
Look readers, I can't lie to you. It's been a rough couple of days for the Misses Soft Crab. This is largely due to a close shave with something that pretty much goes to the core of what this blog is about but I'm pretty sure neither of us a ready to talk about yet . One day, readers, one day. When we learn how to feel again.
In the meantime, I'm afraid I'm struggling to find inspiration. Frankly, I'm struggling with respiration. I just want to lie around and make the moaning sound that Harry makes in that scene in When Harry Met Sally when he makes the moaning sound.
Remember? Here, let me show you. This version is dubbed in Italian but it doesn't matter because the moaning sound is the same in Italian. And it's the only version I could find on the internet.
But it's pretty funny, so you should watch it.
It just so happens that last night I watched a program in which Ewan McGregor went into remote areas of the Congo on a child-vaccinating mission. Perhaps he could turn his attention homeward and help vaccinate his people against stupidity.
Who doesn't love a shortie?! And those shorties you made, mate, look so effing good. I want one. Those little bastards sound delicious. That icing... get the hell outta here! And icing is not a thing that ever gets me excited. Also now I understand why you may or may not have been a little absent during the Oscars. Who wouldn't be paying more attention to a delicious biscuit than that ridiculous excuse for entertainment.
Funnily enough I also made a shortbread-like biscuit recently. In that it was a biscuit that is super buttery, quite crumbly and very effing delicious. You see last Saturday was Purim, a lesser-known/celebrated Jewish holiday. And by coincidence my family were getting together for lunch. Apparently one is supposed to eat a biscuit called a hamataschen. So I made some. Also mum bought some from the local Jewish bakery. Here are mine and the professional ones side by side.
Mine are the messy ones in front. Obviously.
I used this recipe from Smitten Kitchen and I am not kidding when I say that they were fan-fricking-tastic. There was some debate over the lunch table as to whether mine or the pro biscuits were better. Everyone thought my actual biscuit was better but there was division over who had a better poppy seed filling. The commercial one was more full poppy seed flavour. Like, traditional flavour. Mine on the other hand was a bit more... not traditional. The poppy seed is ground
then dressed up with with Grand Marnier, orange zest, lemon juice. These are probably largely unnecessary.
The bought biscuit was more dense and mine was more buttery, lighter, lemony. And on the whole I think it was a generally superior biscuit. Like, if you just want to eat the sweet poppy seed goo, sure, buy a commercial biscuit, but if you want to eat a delicious effing biscuit, eat the Smitten kitchen one.
On a sidenote, thanks Scotland for sending great things like shortbread on Ewan our way.
Scotland has given Miss Soft Crab two of our favourite things: Ewan McGregor and shortbread.
It's also given me black pudding which I love very much but there is no way I'm getting the J-Crab on board with that. So let's stick to Ewan and shorties. Or to be more precise, let's stick to shorties, because Wednesday is Miss Soft Crab's new food day and I think we've said all we need to say about Ewan.
So, shortbread.
I love shortbread.
I love how solid and sturdy it is, and how it crumbles so satisfyingly at first bite. I love how it tastes like butter. I love how it is plain and simple in its deliciousness, how without pretension it is. I love how it goes with a cup of tea.
Sometimes I think I'll make shortbread to have around the house for when people drop by for a cup of tea, and up until the moment that I burn my tongue on that first piping hot bite of shortie I actually think people are going to drop by for a cup of tea.
Here are some pistachio shortbread I made at Christmas
The other night I made some in order to win the hearts and minds of the team of people I am 'directing' while I temporarily assume the position of Director while my real boss is in Scotland, the home of shortbread and Ewan McGregor.
Instead of the traditional shortie, I made this, which is more of a shortbread-like slice. Some might call it a bastardisation of true shortbread because it doesn't include ground rice, used in a proper shortie, the thing that gives it that lovely crumbly texture. And it's covered in icing made from golden syrup and butter and ginger. So sure, those that call it a bastardisation are some accurate bastards. But what a delicious bastardisation it is. The butteryness, the crumble, the gooeyness of the icing against that sturdy biscuit base. Go ahead and bastardise away.
I do, however, think it could use more ginger. Especially in the icing. By following the recipe I got a hint of ginger, but was left wanting more, perhaps enough so there is a lingering sensation of heat. If one is going to bastardise, one should bastardise boldly, should one not?
Regardless, because I may or may not have been making it while e-chatting with J during the oscars ceremony, I have no photos of the process.
But this is what it looks like when I eat the leftovers at my desk with a coffee.
Around here there are few hunks that compare to Ewan McGregor and you can bet your acres that come the last Friday of the month we are always stretching our brains to think of who to celebrate in Hunk of the Month Club. Hunks ain't what they used to be. But, alas, an early tribute to Ewan disqualifies him from the HotMC race. So, in the interest of celebrating hunks as they should be, here are some haiku especially for Ew.
I was totally expecting K to write about Thermomix. I certainly was not expecting that post to end with a picture of Ewan! And I was definitely not expecting Baby to see that picture of Ewan and say 'Daddy?' I told him it wasn't but he was pretty adamant. 'That's Ewan McGregor,' I told him to which he replied 'I think it's Daddy.' And geez you can only argue with a 2-year-old so long before you have to let him win.
What I have learnt from Wayward Wednesday is that:
Holy Muthereffing moly I have never wanted to be a millionaire as much as I do right now!
I want to eat the heck out of one of those 'shortbreads'
the fact that I feel a little rough after the 2012 Trivia Grand Final last night (we lost by half a point)
the fact that I had to get up at sparrows to write this because I have to go to a meeting in Pakenham and it takes 80 minutes to get from Melbourne Central Station to Pakenham by train I KNOW CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!
today's AM post is going to be a little wayward, by which I mean it will be a bit lame.
Let me stress that unlike Terrific Tuesday (which I hope will live forever), Wayward Wednesday is not going to become a thing, it's just something I am doing today.
Well you better believe I followed through. And I didn't just eat any shortbread. No sirree. I ate a millionaires shortbread, which is what they call caramel slice these days. Or at least, what they call it at this place near my work. I thought it would be delicious but it wasn't. It was the most delicious thing ever! Bam!
It hit my tongue and melted like butter, but instead of just tasting like butter it tasted like butter and salt and caramel and chocolate. If you imagine normal shortbread to be like normal Scottish people (i.e. nice, adorable), then millionaire's shortbread is like Ewan McGregor (i.e. sublime, the best thing).
It took me a long time to get on Twitter and that is basically because I knew what would happen. I'd become hooked on it and get lost in that weird little world. That's not exactly what happened. Or at least not in an extreme way. I know that I don't really know Alec Baldwin (thank God. I mean, I love Jack Donaghy, but talk about self-righteous) or Ewan McGregor but when you spend a lot of time on Twitter things get weird.
On Monday while innocently listening to a podcast of a radio show from the US I heard an unannounced spoiler for Breaking Bad. I felt furious. Really furious. Blood boilingly. I don't know why exactly, but I did. And for some reason I wanted to tweet about it. I felt like it was the only way I could get over my fury. By telling David Bianculli of TV Worth Watching to go fuck himself and by telling Aaron Paul what had happened. I didn't. I kept it to myself. If you call telling K about it keeping it to myself. Which I do.
And something else is happening. People I follow keep appearing in my dreams. Yeah, I know. My mum recently was laughing at the fact that when I was little I used to dream about famous people all the time. I may have grown out of this if it weren't for this crazy world we live in. The other day Joseph Gordon-Levitt was up in that brain and then on Monday night Mindy Kaling and Aziz Ansari were in my dream.
Crazy thing was I only started following Aziz that very day! Why were Mindy and Aziz in my dream. Did my brain put them together because they are Indian? Nah, probs just because they are both funny. Right? Right brain? That's why you put them there? When I woke up from that dream I thought, "Boy, J, you really got to stop looking at Twitter before bed." At which point I fell back asleep and promptly had a dream about Breaking Bad starring Jesse Pinkman. You know, Aaron Paul, who I follow on Twitter.
Do you know what film I love? Baz Luhrmann's! All of them. Yep, even Australia. I know it got a bad wrap, but I loved it. I loved the Wizard of Oz thing it had going on. That Technicolour styling. And you know what else? It made me feel things. When Drover was running around thinking Nicole was dead after Darwin was bombed...I really felt it. So sue me.
I like Australia a lot. But in fact Strictly Ballroom and Romeo + Juliet are actually two of my favourite films.
And Moulin Rouge! Of course I effing love that film. The singing! The dancing! The drama! The Ewan! Spectacular, spectacular!
I think Baz makes fucking great films. I think they are beautiful, but not without substance. That is to say I think they have substance. I respond to them on all sorts of levels and that is exactly what I want from a film and rarely what I get. Sure, they are not super deep but who wants that in all the films? Not me. Some films, yes. All the films, no
It is fair to say that I am pretty damn excited about The Great Gatsby. And not just because I love Baz, but because I also effing love that book. What a goddamn beautiful marriage! Not to mention the beautiful reuniting of DiCaprio and Luhrmann. Yeah, I am excited.
So, a few weeks ago, I saw the trailer on the news. I have to say I felt a little concerned. Yeah it had the energy and beauty I expected from Baz but that party scene, presumably Gatsby's first party, it looked so much like the R+J party.
Gatsby's party
The Capulet's party
See?
Maybe Baz is just being super self-referential, but I couldn't help feeling a little worried that maybe it would be a rehash of old turf.
But then, well, I watched it again.
The hedonism, the tortured lovers, the pain, the joy, yeah, it kind of is a rehash. A rehash of all the stuff Baz does best! Like the genius he is! I can't fucking wait!
Today I thought I was all ready to tell you all these thoughts I have been having about Prince. Not just Prince, but music in general. But then it got kind of confronting. Like, am I really ready to talk to you about the visceral response to music, my ideas about how live music is so awesome because it makes some imagined world created by music somehow almost tangible, but also tantalisingly less tangible, and how the first time I heard 'Gett Off' my mind was totally blown. No. No way. I am totally not ready to go there. Sorry guys. (But go and watch the clip for 'Gett Off'. It's so awesome but I can't embed it.)
'But', I thought to myself, 'What am I going to write about?' So I looked around for inspiration. And found it in one of my favourite places. The Internet! Actually, I found it right here in the back end of Miss Soft Crab, specifically in the keyword search traffic sources. Firstly, you may be interested to know that not a single Ewan McGregor-related phrase was in the top ten search terms bringing people here. 'Jedward' was (thanks Eurovision) and so was 'Seal's face' (thanks The Voice). And so was 'fish that looks like a man'. I mean, geez, you talk about a fathead sculpun one time and suddenly 'fish that looks like a man' is bringing in the audience. So I thought I would see what happened when I asked Google for a 'fish that looks like a man'. I'll tell you what happened, as I started writing the Google predictive text told me that the second most searched for fish look alike, after 'fish that looks like a dog' is 'fish that looks like hitler'. No wonder. Turns out there are a heap of those little bastards out there:
Then I decided to see what other animals look like people. There are dogs that look like Snoop Dogg. Of course.
I also tried for pigs that look like people. But apparently people only ever ask Google to find images of 'pigs that look like sheep' and 'pigs that look like a willy'. WTF, people?!? WTF?
Finally it became quite clear that I had to see if there were any dogs that look like Ewan McGreggor. Apparently there aren't, so Google offered up this instead.
You know, Miss Soft Crab turned 1 on Wednesday. In its first year Miss Soft Crab published 459 posts and had about 27500 page views. And only a small portion of those were from spam sites! YEAH!
And the top 10 search terms bringing you our way were:
Ewan McGregor Trainspotting
Miss Soft Crab
Trainspotting
Trainspotting Ewan McGregor
Michelle Williams yellow dress
Cloud
Neil Patrick Harris
What happened to Seal's face
Jedward
Picture of an iceberg
Seriously, I love Ewan too, people, but move on.
But what are these but statistics. Just numbers. They don't tell the whole story. They don't tell you that people have found their way here by searching "fucking eggplant", "ass dick and brioche" or "cute puffin." They don't tell you how much delight a bunch of Christian Bale fans got from our Oscars post as testified by a imdb.com message board. No, statistics are just the numbers.
Let K and me tell you the whole story.
J: So, mate. Miss Soft Crab turned one this week! Happy Birthday! How do you feel?
K: Happy birthday Miss Soft Crab! I feel great! How do you feel? Great, right? What a year it's been. Eating, seeing stuff, thinking about stuff. For a whole year!
J: I KNOW! A whole year! Do you remember how this thing started?
K: Actually, no, I've totally forgotten. Please remind me!
J: Well, I think we were lamenting the fact that all our favourite blogs had gotten shit so we thought we should write our own. And then 2 weeks later we did! Can you believe that of all the plans we've had and things we said we'd do, we finally did one?!
Perhaps I shouldn't share that story, 'cause when the readers decide this blog has gone shit they will be all 'haha!' Oh well.
K: But amusing our readers is exactly what we're here for, Mate! And, unlike other blogs, we're not at risk of going shit because we go a bit shit regularly. But then we bounce back! It's the beauty of Miss Soft Crab!
Speaking of the beauty of Miss Soft Crab, perhaps now is a good time to tell the readers why we are called what we are called. I don't know about you, but if I had a dollar for every time someone asked me why Miss Soft Crab is called Miss Soft Crab, I would have about $7.
J: Probably I'd have about $3. Cause you are much more friendly than me and people don't like to ask me questions. But yes, go ahead, tell the people. Or should we show them?
As you can probably tell, that's a clip from Hairspray, we don't actually know Debbie Harry. Hairspray came out in 1988, the same year J and I met and when we were little crabs, we used to watch it all the time. Loved the shit out of it. Still do. When we decided to write this blog, we wanted to find a name that came from the early days of us seeing, eating and thinking about stuff together. Our thoughts turned to Hairspray and Miss Soft Crab was born!
J: Yep, that's how we got the name. So after about 460 posts, mate, have you got a favourite?
K: I pretty much have a new favourite every week. But highlights include:
and absolutely without a doubt Multi-faith Haiku Thursday.
But there are so many winners! I mean out of 460 posts I can assure the world there are more than just the eight good ones listed here.
How about tags? Do you have favourite tags. Personally, I like caution, dates initiated by parents that will come to nothing, Germans, signs of success, i love you guys, sorry readers i think I may be hysterical and apes. I am not saying these are the best posts, but they are great tags, some of which should definitely be used more! Which ones do you like?
K: There are so many tags we should use more! For example, 'marscapone'. It was used once last year, but never again. Why, I'd like to know, when marscapone is so absolutely delicious.
Other tags I have enjoyed are: UGH, nutting up, bullshit and Fassbender. That last one I like because I like Fassbender and everything he stands for. Or sits for. Ha!
Speaking of Fassbender sitting, one of my favourite things about this past year of Miss Soft Crab has been reviewing the search terms people use to find us. We've written about it a few times but honestly, the ones you guys have heard about are just the tip of the iceberg.
J: Yeah, search terms can be great. Recent highlights include Ryan Gosling hair, superman sign with a k instead (Mate, did you search for this?) and Aragorn WTF face! WTF?
K: In addition to hilarious search terms, there have been some pretty hilarious comments too. The most amusing relate to Jennifer Grey's nose job. You guys might not know this, but there is a pretty significant pro-nose job lobby out there, and they get pissed when you express a preference for original noses.
J: Yeah, those Jennifer Grey comments were weird. But I am pretty sure they were spam. I have to say my favourite comment came from someone called MC, but in truth I question the reality of that person too
K: Oh yes, the famous MC. Possible boyfriend of Miss Dizzy.
J: Possible boyfriend of Miss Dizzy! Yes! We have touched so many hearts and minds. But so many hearts and minds and faces have touched us too. Everyone we know and love and also don't know and love have been great in allowing us to immortalise them here!
K: That is so true. The people we know and love are the best - letting us talk about them like we do and posing for photos from behind all the time. I love those guys. And you guys, readers, YOU GUYS! We effing love you! We are so happy you guys come to to Miss Soft Crab and let us tell you about the things we eat, see and think about. For serious - we love it. How can we repay you? If we could we would give you the world, but that is not possible so, Mate, what do you say get Prince to show the people how much we love him. THEM! Shit. I mean them.
J: Yeah, Prince probably said it best. Thanks everyone!
