What I know and like (PM)

I don't want to come down on Australia, because, shit you guys, I love a sunburnt country, but how about how in Europe you can just get delicious cheese everywhere like it ain't no thang!? We could do with more of that here.  When I was looking for Welsh cake recipes on the internet I found one that called for 'butter (preferably Welsh)' and I was all 'yeah right'. But now I feel really sad I can't make Welsh cakes with Welsh butter. 

And why are those lambies so cute! It's true Australian lambs are cute but those little Welshies are delightful!

Look, Mate, all I ask is that in Ireland you don't go on about the chips and curry. I don't know if my saliva and jealousy glands can take it. 

An open letter to Andy Murray (AM)

Dear Andy Murray, 

I'm really sorry about the Wimbledon thing the other night. You really are a very good tennis player but you seem to find it extremely difficult to win grand slam finals, especially those that are against Roger. 

Roger. 

I bet you sometimes wish you hadn't been born at the same time as Roger. Wish you didn't have to see that perfect ball placement. Wish you didn't have to bear witness to his power and his grace. Because it must be said, Andy Murray, if it weren't for Roger, Rafa probably wouldn't be Rafa, Djokovic wouldn't be Djokovic and you Andy Murray - you would probably be number one. But instead, fate had you born and born with a gift for tennis in the same era as the Roger, the best tennis player that ever has been and ever will be. It's a tough break Andy Murray, and I feel for you. But check it out, Andy Murray: to hep you get through this difficult time, I have prepared a list of things that I think you are better at than Roger. Perhaps you will look at it from time to time, and perhaps it will provide some consolation to you during these times. 

1. Having a lovely accent.

Andy Murray, You have a really nice accent. I actually have no interest in hearing Roger speak, but I could listen to you all night long. Everyone loves a Scottish accent and that's exactly what yours is: Scottish. It must be nice to sound so nice, Andy Murray. Don't bother asking the Roger what it feels like - he wouldn't have a clue!

2. Looking really handsome when you smile

It's the elephant in the room, but I'm going to come out and say it. Roger looks a bit weird when he smiles. Does he have a slight underbite or something maybe? 

It's weird. right?

I'm not sure what the problem is, but there's something a but wrong with it I think. Not you, Andy Murray. You look really handsome when you smile. See?

Just jokes. 

There you go, Andy Murray. Nice and handsome. Roger wishes he looked like that when he smiles (maybe he does, I'm not sure). 

3. Being lanky

Andy Murray, as a young Scottish man, you are very lanky and that's quite nice.

Roger can not look lanky to save his life. 

Nothing lanky about that, am I right?

But you, Andy Murray, you nail  it, my lanky brother!

Having said that, you don't look terribly lanky in that picture, but I have it in my mind that you are lanky, so lets just go with that shall we.

Speaking of my mind, it doesn't seem to want to recall further areas where you perform better than Roger.
But I'm sure there are heaps and heaps. These are just three. And three out of four ain't bad! Its actually quite good, because Meatloaf tells us that two out of three ain't bad, so the logical next verse would be and "three out of four is quite good".

Good luck at the Olympics!

Love from K

Things are rough all over

In the interest of full disclosure I will admit that when I read your post this morning I felt jealous. Yep. Actually jealous. I felt worse when I realised I will probably be 50 before I get to have a holiday like yours. And while I am glad 50 is almost 20 years away I am sad that a wonderful holiday such as yours is also nearly 20 years away. This is a really complex issue.

Don't get me wrong. I am happy for you and KJ that you are living the sweet life. Lord knows you could use a break from all that auditing and KJ certainly needs to take a breather from all those bomb checks.

Anyways, as I was feeling sorry for myself I went to the park and put Baby on the slide and he looked so goddamned happy that made me feel better. Now I am home and Doggy and Baby both appear to be sleeping the sleep of very contented creatures and look adorable so I thought to myself, suck it up bitch, your life is alright. But then I thought to myself, hey so what if this life is sweet, wouldn't lying on a beach, swimming in the Carribean and drinking sundowners also be sweet? Why wouldn't I want that also. God! So complex!

Right now, you feel like this woman (though obviously you guys are not in business suits)*:
I can't even remember the last time I punched the air. Though I do remember when I deferred uni this semester I ran to the car where LB was waiting and jumped in the air and clicked my heels. I guess that is almost the same thing. But usually I would have to say a visual representation of my joy feelings would more closely align with this:

And that's cool too. Better than feeling like this I guess:



*It's true readers, yesterday K sent me a picture of her and KJ doing exactly this.