The sweet scent of summer (AM)

Like most people I've been pretty damn cheesed off about this pathetic excuse for a spring. Maybe it's because all the rain has made life with this bullshit haircut more unbearable than I knew was possible. Maybe it's because I can't fit into my jeans and so have nothing to wear when the it is cold and wet. Maybe it's because it's been cold for the last 8 months and the reviving trip to North American summer only had reviving powers to last 6 to 8 weeks.Whatever it is I'm...cheesed off. I'm not saying this spring has been total bullshit. There have been nice days all over the place, I'll admit it. But there have also been so many bullshit cold wet days it's easy to forget the winners. And yesterday, yesterday was really the first taste of summer. Am I right?

 Like first in the morning I had to drive across town and it was hot and uncomfortable and I didn't like it much. But later in the day when I was at the pool I was pretty much loving the shit out of it.

After my swim (relax in the kids pool) I ran into a friend in the change room. She'd just arrived and complained about the heat "It's really hot. You know how you want it but then when it gets here you realise you are not prepared?" she said. I did know what she meant but after two hours in the pool I was pretty removed from that feeling. It wasn't long though until, waiting among a bunch of cu...people to be served some delicious ice cream at Messina I was hot and annoyed and I knew exactly what she meant. Hot hot heat can suck.

Tell that to the me that ate my dinner by the beach though as the sun set and boats sailed in.

Or the me that ate stone fruit salad for dessert.

The me that struggled to get comfortable for sleep due to heat would believe you though.

Summer, it makes you laugh, makes you cry, makes you fall in love all over again.

Acrostic Monday (AM)

Boy                                             

Real. Shit is getting real               

Every week the end is closer       

And how can Jesse be ok?          

Knowing what I know                   

I've seen enough to know            

Nothing can go right                    

Gah!                                            

Breaking Bad, I long for your end

And yet...                                    

Don't go                                     

An open letter to Autumn (AM)

Hey Autumn,
J is right about your light, and the things you do to leaves. You got this town blushin' for you girl.
But baby, I can't lie to you. You put a chill in my bones. Yesterday, you sent a cold southern wind right through me and I know you got more coming. Girl, you made me so cold, I decided to stop off at the store to have a look at Lamby on my way to dinner last night.

Remember Lamby, Autumn?

I went and touched her strong arms and nuzzled my face against her soft soft collar and dammit Autumn, it felt so good. But I know she can never be mine.

I don't think I can love you like J does, or like I love a bag of chips,  but I respect you, Girl. And I'm really happy for you and J.

So long, Autumn.

I have a new mantra (PM)

Mate, did you buy Jerusalem and not tell me?! Or is that someone else's nice looking bookshelf?
Oh wait, that post is about stuff you want, not stuff you have. Right, I get it.

Ok, so it's great that you are trying to resist the urge to buy stuff during this season of loving and giving. Those of us who know you in the real world know that loving and giving is something you do freely and willingly all year round, so you don't need to worry about justifying this urge. But I support you in your efforts to resist it.

But Matey, I'm not sure it's a good idea to have the word 'hate' in your mantra. Hate is the worst.

How about:

Stuff. Who needs it?

It's a little friendlier, don't you think?

Stuff. Who needs it?

I have a new mantra (AM)

When I say I have a new mantra it is not that I really had a mantra before this. Unless you count ‘sausages’. Sausages was the mantra we, Chickpea, Russeth and I, prescribed to our parents as children because they meditated and refused to tell us their mantra. And I guess not fully understanding how things work we decided sausages was a possible word they may meditate with. I can only assume that Chickpea was the mastermind behind this and it is possible she had a better understanding than me of the whole meditation thing. Or maybe she didn't. Whatever the truth is, throughout my childhood I always used to pretend to meditate with the word sausages.

I don’t pretend to meditate anymore but I have started to use a mantra, “I hate stuff”.

You see guys, I don’t know if you know this about me, but actually, I love stuff!! And this weird thing happens at Christmas. I want to buy heaps of stuff! For me! It’s not that I don’t like giving presents to people. I do. I love buying and giving presents. But I love doing that for me too! Perhaps it’s the additional advertising and push to sell that does it. Perhaps it is the start of summer and the promise of a beautiful summer  life. I don’t know. I just know I want stuff. And so, in attempt to curb my desire for stuff, every time I feel the feeling I just think “I hate stuff!”

I hate stuff like this:



And stuff like this:





And I hate stuff like this:

I hate stuff.

I hate stuff.

I hate stuff.

I hate stuff.

Now, please excuse me. I need to go focus on my mantra.

I hate stuff.

I hate stuff.

An open letter to Country Road (PM)

Postscript to J's letter to country road


PS: Yeah, Country Road. J'accuse!

Your inability to make a nice cosy 100% wool knit for women makes me think you hate women. Like you think we are just a bunch of chumps who are so motivated by fashion that we don't care about value or natural fibres. That we just love shopping so damn much that we will gladly fork over hundreds of dollars for a wool blend while our brothers only have to fork over hundred of dollar, singular, for 100% wool. Thick, cosy, 100% wool.
You think that women don't like thick, cosy, 100% wool? You're out of your minds, Country Road.
We'll fork over the money, Country Road, but we won't be happy about it.

Women haters!

Here's what I think of you, Country Road! And this is what it looks like when one buys a wool-blend Country Road slanket  just so one can get a piece of that thick, warm and cosy for oneself. 

An open letter to Country Road (AM)

Dear Country Road

For years I have been enraged by the disparity between your men's and women's knits. The inequality. And for years I have been only half informed about how great this disparity actually is. I was blind to the greater injustices.

For all these years I thought that the problem was that although you sold lovely, thick, warm, simple, 100% wool jumpers for men you did not provide the same product for women. No, for us you provide thin merino knits, jumpers with cowl necks, bat wings, excess size, asymmetry, acrylic blends. For us there is no simple, thick, warm, 100% wool. And this I have held against you. Not so much that I won't buy things from you, but just enough to feel annoyed every winter when I want a nice thick knit like my boyfriend.

And because of this I didn't notice the real inequality. The complete ridiculousness of the pricing disparity. Like the one I discovered yesterday. Why does a women's fair isle knit that is 75% acrylic cost $149 while a men's fair isle in 100% lambswool cost $129?

Huh? HUH? WTF Country Road?!

And it doesn't matter that I love the shit out of that 100% lambswool men's knit. I love that it is chunky, navy and cream and plain cut. I love it so much I bought it. I am wearing it right now and I never want to take it off. I love it more than I have ever loved a jumper before. I effing love it.

But that is totally beside the point, Country Road. Why you gotta price things so sexist? It's the 21st century, man! Do better.

Love
J

Me just loving the shit out of this jumper

It's Complicated (PM)

I have two key points in response to this morning's post. 

The first point relates to bedtime.
I sometimes wonder whether a regular bedtime would make life more bearable. These days, I go to bed whenever I please, because that is the adult's prerogative. But I do spend an awful lot of time feeling really tired, and I can't ignore the correlation.
Sometimes I think that if I go to bed at 10pm I will feel much more on top of things, but is it really sustainable? What if I can't go to sleep at that time and I'm just left lying there like a chump? That's what all of childhood was like! I don't want to go back to that. I need to speak to someone who has instituted this system. Readers, if any of you guys do it, please leave a comment below and tell me what it's like.

The second point relates to winter and how cold it is and how it seems to last forever.
I know I'm late coming to the party on this, but I just started watching Game of Thrones the other day and a lot of it is set in "the North" which in their world is really cold, unlike the north of Australia which we all know is nice and warm. Not only does it look really cold, but they like to talk about how cold it is. And if someone wants to insult someone else, they say something like "you think this is cold? you don't know real cold" and it is nearly always snowing while they say it which makes me think it is in fact quite cold so this other level of cold must be off the charts. They also insult people by calling them bastards and whores a lot.
Anyway, the way they cope with the cold in Game of Thrones is to wear lots of fur, and they sleep under lovely fur blankets. After watching a few episodes one can't help but think Fur. Of course. That's how practical people stay warm in the winter. Now obviously the people of "the North" do not have to consider the ethical issues with wearing fur that we here in contemporary times have to consider. But nor do they have to fear Melbourne cold getting in to their bones in, say, May and not leaving until November. That's all I'm saying.

This guys is one of the bastards from Game of Thrones, and here he is modelling some fur. 

It's complicated (AM)

I know that it was less than a week ago that I was singing autumn's praises. And I stand by everything I said. I love autumn. I love the clothes you get to wear. I love the colours and the light and the transition to heavier, redder foods. But all relationships are complicated, right?

Like, even though I love autumn, I kind of hated how when I got home from the pub yesterday evening it was practically already dark even though it was only 6:30. I also hated how even though it was not a very cold day I felt really cold when I got home and I couldn't really shake it. And I hated how I remembered how these feelings are just going to get stronger over the next 5 months.

But then I loved how effing good a cup of tea tasted. I love how good tea and toast in the evening is in autumn. And even in winter. And when I got into bed it was so warm I can't remember the last time it felt that good. In fact it felt so good that even though it was 8 o'clock and I just got in to read Baby a story I fell asleep. I love how good sleeping in autumn is. But I am pretty sure I don't want to go to sleep at 8 o'clock for the next 5 months.

Shit, it's really complicated.