See you next week

This week there has been a lot of illness in my house. At least it feels like that to me. There has been snot, vomit, tiredness, body pain. Flu.😫 Basically there has been flu. And I have not been immune. Literally. I was not immune and have been feeling like shit. Last night I went to bed at 7:30 and that helped but I'm still feeling pretty off. And its school holidays which means that I have to find something entertaining for Baby which doesn't involve him watching hours of television. (Don't get me wrong, he's been doing heaps of that but I can't let him do that all the time). So now I'm going to leave the house and go to the movies. Oh sure, it's just like watching a giant TV but there will be some sunshine on the way from the house to the car so at least there is that. Let's hope next week I'll be back better than ever!😖

It's the little things (AM)

I had a pretty busy weekend. That is I spent all weekend organising then having then coming drown from Baby's 3-month late birthday party. As a result my body is quite sore, as if I'd done a big run or some new kind of exercise except it's just from trying to operate like a normal adult. It's pretty disheartening. But it's really making me look forward to having my baby. Of course I'm looking forward to meeting my baby but I'm also really looking forward to:

Walking without a waddle

Moving from a standing to sitting position (or vice versa) without involuntarily groaning. Really loudly. 

Wearing my jeans

Beer

It's the little things. 

Now excuse me while I pass out. But not without groaning loudly first. 

A very little something (AM)

Yesterday while driving to the Queen Vic market I wrote all of today's post in my head. I felt pretty productive but the problem with writing posts in one's head is that until we have computer chips implanted in our heads all that writing is going to stay up there. It's such a conundrum because on the one hand I don't want AI in my brain and on the other hand, well shiiiiiit, it would make so many things so much easier. Like paying bills and writing emails and definitely writing blog posts. Because by the time I sat down to write my post last night at 11:30 I'd been looking after my children all day and editing some woefully written articles all night all while recovering from a cold. I don't want to make excuses, but you know where I wrote the words "computer chips" 6 lines above here? I had to type that three times because it kept coming out "computer ships". Which doesn't even make any sense because I love chips heaps more than ships.

So rather than rewrite the post from my brain I did what I always do when I want to share something cool with the Soft Crab community without putting in too much effort. I went to Facebook to see if anyone had shared anything good. I hardly ever look at Facebook. Sometimes I log on and then after looking at nothing I log straight off. I hate it. But the internet gods were smiling on me last night because someone had posted a link to this.

It's not so amazing or anything, and maybe I was just really tired last night, but I love the movie Princess Bride and it was just real nice thinking about it and thinking about the whole gang back together again. And just when I was feeling all tired and happy I read the first comment under the photo, which said "The pic of Andre in the bottom corner... Feels :("

Hahaha "Feels"!

I hope Andre and Peter Falk are totally RIPing.

Recent purchase (PM)

So I kind of love that boys t-shirt from target and when I saw it I thought “I want it.” And then I thought. “Maybe I should just buy it Baby.” HE loves sharks. And hammerheads?! Forget about it. But it is daylight savings day 2. And Newbie is teething which means much of my sleep is disrupted. And I was on a train to Clayton when I read K’s morning post. So what I’m trying to say is that I have no idea what is real and what is caused by the strange circumstances of life. Also, I love a white t-shirt. Even with stuff on it. You know, if it is cool stuff. Like sharks.

Also I kind of want to buy stuff all the time and last night I nearly bought a bunch of stuff from UniQlo via the internet but then stopped myself at the last minute but now can’t stop thinking about the stuff and how I should just buy it. God! I wish I had a recent purchase to share, but all I’ve got is the $10 Myki top up I did this morning.

Recent purchase (AM)

KB is currently enjoying feeding every couple of hours during the night, while refusing to breastfeed during the day, which is to say that fair is foul and foul is motherflipping fair at our house at the moment. (Who has seen Macbeth?! We saw it the other night. Fassbender rules! Literally!)

Anyway, the upshot of all this is that I am very tired and I inevitably go to Northland every day in an effort to keep KB occupied during those long afternoons. 

These factors combined led to me buying this tshirt from the teenage boys section of Target. 

It was only a tenner! 

I've worn it a couple of times too and because I am quite tired all the time, I love it. 

Shana tova (AM)

Oh you guys I'm so hungover. I mean it's new year, right?! What do you expect?

Jewish new year. But still. And by hungover, I mean fat. Like I ate way too much food last night and have all the shame and regrets and struggle with my body that a night of binge eating brings, which is similar to those that binge drinking brings. 

So you know it's pretty much just like any New Year's Day of yesteryear, my head is useless and I'm full of self-loathing and resolutions. Which I'm hoping to act out. You know because it's spring!

So happy 5776 everyone! Let's hope it's a great year!

Questions from the boarding lounge (PM) (or The questions of a tired woman sitting in a dining room)

Why does the garden always get so full of shit? Will it ever get clean and stay clean? I wonder how long K had to sit in that boarding lounge for? Was her plane late? At least she is going to Hobart, I love Hobart. I wonder when I can go to Hobart again? Why am I so tired after Baby's swimming lesson? It wasn't my swimming lesson. Does 45 minutes in the pool with Newbie justify my exhaustion? I wonder how long I can let Baby watch TV without feeling bad about my parenting? Why doesssszzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......

Down time (PM)

Oh god mate, I know exactly what you mean and I don't even work or really have any serious commitment, except, you know, to raising my children.  This morning I was thinking how I wished this was the last week of Baby's swimming lessons just because I can't be bothered anymore, not that I'd be doing anything better with that time. I guess I just want some down time too. I'm just limping towards Christmas break of 2016 when Newbie should be old enough to join Baby for sleepovers at my folks' place and it'll be all down for 24 hours.

Down time (AM)

Who feels totally strung out and like things are busier than ever and like they desperately need some down time??!!

Yeah, me too. 

I feel a little hesitant to say that because

a) things can always get busier

b) unlike J, I don't have two small children to look after, and I'm pretty sure I don't know busyness until I know that situation. 

Side note: the other day I was talking to my Mum and saying how full on it seems for people with two children, and I asked her how she managed with three. She said she didn't know. She said sometimes she thinks about how for about a decade, she worked four days, looked after three kids (which includes cooking every meal and washing every thread of clothing etc. etc. etc.) and saw her Mother for a quick visit every day and she has no clue, absolutely no clue, how she managed it. I did not feel comforted by these words 

Right now, I'm longing for a little down time. I fantasise about having a couple of days where I don't have to do anything or be anywhere. I would sleep in and then go get a coffee and maybe make shortbread. Or better still, just eat a shortbread. Mmmm. I guess all that stuff is pretty achievable. I just need to limp towards the Christmas break and it's going to be all down, all the time. In a good way. 

PS: I find that photo of the welsh lamb very soothing

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (PM)

I saw K and Appleheart the day after they got back and they seemed great! I was really impressed with how together they were but after an hour the yawns started and I could see the fades set in. I can't say I'm surprised that by today K is feeling so zapped. Yesterday I felt totally zapped myself. Constant yawning an inability to move, it strikes me like that some afternoons but then I rally, cook dinner, it passes. Not being jetlagged you forget what jetlag feels like. I guess it's like yesterday afternoon without the ability to rally so easily. So why don't we all take a load off, think about what we may do on the weekend and reconvene hear on Monday!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (AM)

I'm back you guys, and more jet lagged than ever!
I wanted to write some things about how nice it is to be back, and how I'd forgotten how nice Melbourne smells in the springtime when the sun is shining and the flowers are blooming. And how the coffee is every bit as good as I remember. And about how cute Newbie is. You guys should see that kid! Happy as a pig in mud.
But I'm so zapped from the jet lag I can barely string a sentence together, so I'm just going to say hi and then be on my way.
I feel like this guy, but without the polar fleece to lie on, and without the people cooing over me.
Oh well. I'll be back on form next week for sure. Until then, readers!

Notes (PM)

Strangely enough, I was awake at 3am this morning too. I wasn't feeding anyone, though I did think about getting a midnight snack. Didn't, though. Probably should have. 

Anyway, I had a look at my notes too, and sure enough they are full of the same nonsense as J's.

That one that starts with 'Does anyone else t...' goes on to ask the question 'think it should be Friday today?'.

Like I even ask that question. The answer is pretty much always yes. 

The new guy (AM)

This is not exactly true, but let's just say I'm super tired so excuse me while I say zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Moving (PM)

Even the good moves, the ones where you can leave a bunch of stuff behind at your parents house, are exhausting. They are preceded by all that packing and cleaning and I don't know about you guys, but packing and cleaning are two things that really make me want to go zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

The weird thing about sleeping in a new house is that all your stuff is there, but it doesn't feel like yours. That's what I reckon. But I'm not Doctor Move, so don't take that as the definitive answer.

Regardless, I can't wait to visit the new house! In addition to coming over when I am invited, I am also going to do the old drop in with afternoon sometimes. I love doing the old drop-in.

Before I go,  I just want to show you all the new household accessory I got for my birthday.

Isn't it great? It's both a very pretty thing AND it helps me feel like an adult because it's a place to keep my keys. Thanks G-Force.

Moving (AM)

Whoa you guys. When was the last time you moved house? For me it was yesterday. I know can you believe it, after all this talk and time. But shit you guys, it is really tiring. And I did it in the most easiest way ever. That is I took a bunch of stuff from one house to another, left a bunch of stuff behind to get later and had a nice clean organised new house by the end of the day. This is the blessing of moving out of your folks' place I guess. No keys to hand back to real estate agents with nothing but steam cleaned carpets left behind. And yet it's still totally freaking exhausting. 

And weird. I've already spent lots of time in my new place but moving in, staying the night, it's weird. Why is it so weird? Staying over night in a hotel isn't weird but staying over night in your new house is totally weird. Is it just because you're really tired by the time night falls? Or is it because you have a whole unprecedented chunk of life ahead of you? Dunno. 

What I do know though is that whbklpggxzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Sounds like my Wednesday night (PM)

Mate, your Wednesday night sounds great! And nothing like my Wednesday night.

Not that I can complain. I had Indian takeaway that really hit the motherflipping spot. Then I watched an episode of QI totally uninteruppted. Then I went to bed at 9:30 because I was exhausted after a bad night sleept the night before and attending the Fowles' renovator auction where I had to fight every tradey, man, his pregnant wife and their dog for hot deals on bathroom vanities and laundry sinks. So I guess you could say RIPing kind of sounds like my Wednesday night. But not in the same way that it sounds like James Gandolfini's.

Hot in 2013 (PM)

 

Am I interested in getting an Afghan?!?

Nice, Mate! Real nice. Wait until I am at my most vulnerable, having arrived home literally an hour ago after being in transit for the last 30 hours with about 5 broken hours of sleep, and then make me look at pictures of one of the most beautiful dog breeds around, a dog I have wanted for god knows how long and then suggesting maybe I should get one. Of course I am interested! Of course I am!  I wish there was one curled up in my bed right now. And I would lie down next to him, snuggle in and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzxz

 

Stream of hdklg fjnzm,ds./ b (AM)

****^sorry guys!!!!! I thought I published this on Thursday! My bad!*******
You know how sometimes you have a thought and first, before the thought is fully formed, there is a little deformed pre-thought, a hint of the thought, and when the thought is finally formed you realise how deformed that initial pre-formed thought was? You know?

Like, today I thought about writing stream of consiousness style. But for some reason the initial pre-formed and pretty deformed thought had me unconcsiously imagine that my stream of consciousness would look like this: nebskJLRDThlkd dszuidFHndbms  nsmd,f gdFsaiBKH. You know, more face-plant writing than stream of concsiousness writing. Rather than putting down thoughts as they happen, stream of consciousness-style, in my split-second preformed though, this idea just meant mashing the keyboard. Yeah, two different things. I know. And yet, I think perhaps it is a little bit telling of the state of my brain right now. Tired, generally somewhat incoherent. My brain basically is like a keyboard mash. When I though stream of concsiousness, I liked the idea of things just coming out - and ideally being great. Plus, if it was actually like face-plant or keyboard mash writing it would be so easy, but, you know, pretty nonsensical.

I tell you what, how about we wait until I have been northside (of the equator) a little longer and I have wifi on tap and then I will give you something good. Thanks for understanding guys!

Thanks Easter (AM)

The gift of a four day weekend is a precious, precious thing.  Thanks to Easter, I had time to confirm that:

slow cooking a lamb for five hours is the best way to eat lamb.

Pickle knows how to spilt and toast hot cross buns real nice

reviewing the yield from an easter egg hunt is enjoyable

riding the Capital City trail is ace, exhausting fun. 

Thanks Easter. Important lessons to learn, I think. 

Wanna be startin' something (PM)

Don't worry Mate, after the amount of food we put away last night, I'm not expecting you to be inventive. 

Today is the day they call Tuesday

I checked and it's definitely Tuesday. 

This day's going slower

Than watching grass grower

Or listening to songs by Mike Buble.