On this day (PM)

March 1! The day the begins my favourite season – fashion wise at least. I love Autumn in all the ways, but I love Spring and Summer in so many ways too, so who knows what my actual favourite season is.

You know what else happened on this day in history? Ron Howard was born. Also Javier Bardem. And the Salem witch trials began*. But not in that order.

It’s true that Pope B.diddy turned in his badge yesterday, but according to a guy I heard on the radio yesterday he is not in fact returning to Joey Ratzinger. (Or as the kids called him in primary school, Stinky Joey Rat-slinger**). Apparently the ruling Catholics have decided to use the US president rule where guys that used to be presidents still get called Mr President even though they are not presidents anymore. Suck it up guys. Move on. Anyway, B.diddy gets to keep his pope name, apparently. It’s fairly unprecedented, this whole pope stepping down thing and when I heard them talking about it on the radio I was even inclined to tweet.

Obviously  I mean to write 'had to coexist' not 'at to coexist'. That doesn't really mean anything.

Good luck negotiating the transition, Vatican. And happy March 1, y’all.


*According to one website. Wikipedia claims they occurred from February. Maybe that was pretrial. The bit where the lawyers select the jury, try and organise plea bargains, the bit where Corbin Bersen flirts with the pretty lawyer on the other team. That bit.

**This is not actually true. To the best of my knowledge. Also, if Catholic God exists please don’t damn me. I’d like to think you have a sense of humour.

Get out of my head tweeps (PM)

#ohshit

Just when I think I am an independent woman with my own brain, I read Miss Soft Crab and realise that in fact somehow, my brain and J's brain are the same brain. Not just that we think the same thoughts, but that our brain is the same.  

This morning, as I lay in bed dozing, I had a really vivid dream where J and I were walking through an airport with wheelie suitcases and spotted Mindy Kaling in a duty free shop. I said to J "This is our chance to tell Mindy Kaling that we think she's great and to tell her to follow Miss Soft Crab". 

We approached her, and she smiled and looked very encouraging because she seems like a top bird. 

Then it all went to shit!

I tripped and fell over right in front of Mindy Kaling, but went ahead and told her that she should read Miss Soft Crab. Then J got annoyed that I had stuffed up our one chance with Mindy Kaling, and we had a fight. Then I stormed off to look at a duty free shop and J stormed off to look a different duty free shop and we basically stood around sulking while we waited for LB to bring the car around.

Then I woke up!

I swear on the lives of those that I love - all of this is a true fact. I don't know what to make of it, other than maybe I should start following Fassbender on Twitter so that perhaps I will meet him as Carl Jung in a dream and we can workshop it.

Get out of my head tweeps (AM)

It took me a long time to get on Twitter and that is basically because I knew what would happen. I'd become hooked on it and get lost in that weird little world. That's not exactly what happened. Or at least not in an extreme way. I know that I don't really know Alec Baldwin (thank God. I mean, I love Jack Donaghy, but talk about self-righteous) or Ewan McGregor but when you spend a lot of time on Twitter things get weird.

On Monday while innocently listening to a podcast of a radio show from the US I heard an unannounced spoiler for Breaking Bad. I felt furious. Really furious. Blood boilingly. I don't know why exactly, but I did. And for some reason I wanted to tweet about it. I felt like it was the only way I could get over my fury. By telling David Bianculli of TV Worth Watching to go fuck himself and by telling Aaron Paul what had happened. I didn't. I kept it to myself. If you call telling K about it keeping it to myself. Which I do.

And something else is happening. People I follow keep appearing in my dreams. Yeah, I know. My mum recently was laughing at the fact that when I was little I used to dream about famous people all the time. I may have grown out of this if it weren't for this crazy world we live in. The other day Joseph Gordon-Levitt was up in that brain and then on Monday night Mindy Kaling and Aziz Ansari were in my dream.

Crazy thing was I only started following Aziz that very day! Why were Mindy and Aziz in my dream. Did my brain put them together because they are Indian? Nah, probs just because they are both funny. Right? Right brain? That's why you put them there? When I woke up from that dream I thought, "Boy, J, you really got to stop looking at Twitter before bed." At which point I fell back asleep and promptly had a dream about Breaking Bad starring Jesse Pinkman. You know, Aaron Paul, who I follow on Twitter.

More Haiku Thursday

Twitter
Resisting Twitter
I know why I did. Because
Now I'm addicted

Weather
They say that next week
Will be in the low twenties
That will be so sweet

Dizzy
Spinning in circles
Makes Baby dizzy and fall
Pretty fucking cute