Thursday, May 2, 2013

No (AM)


I thought I'd seen it all when the other day, Country Road sent me an email telling me that these jeggings are a 'must have'.

Honestly, Country Road. Get real.
They are jeggings. And they are shiny. 
The only thing that 'must be had' in this scenario is a good hard look at yourselves, Country Road. 
 
I hadn't seen anything yet, however. 
 
When browsing the interwebs for swimsuits I might like to buy for when I GO TO ICELAND NEXT MONTH in order to BATHE IN THE BLUE LAGOON with THESE ADORABLE GOONS I found this.



A pair of bathers adorned with that most practical of swimsuit materials: METAL. 

Its manufacturers ask you to: 

"Indulge yourself with the distinguished glamour of this showgirl inspired piece. The dramatic embellishments and gold hardware give this one-piece swimsuit the ultimate high impact shine."

"Gold hardware". 
"High impact shine". 
Said like these are actual things. 

How do such things get made? So many people would have had to have given this the OK, for it to find its way to the marketplace. But nothing about these bathers are OK! It looks like Brynne Edelston's version of a burkini. 
And you'll never guess how much it costs. Seriously, you couldn't possibly guess this, so don't even try. 


I just...I can't even. 

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