A few weeks ago when Boris Johnson was in ICU with coronavirus, Prince Charles had been recently diagnosed with it and QEII had just given her coronavirus address I couldn’t help thinking about the episode of The Crown this would result in.
It opens at the bustling Wuhan fish market. A cold, frosty morning. Fishmongers pull fish from a truck, cold air rises from from large dead fish. A man coughs. A week later: the streets of Wuhan. People in masks, coughing. Full hospitals. Chinese officials around boardroom tables speaking frantically. Cut to QE II in the parlour where she always watches TV, a news caster reports on a deadly new virus spreading through China. “Oh dear,” says the queen.
Cut to opening credits.
The episode is all phone calls with Boris, debates over whether the UK should start shutting things down or stand strong, questions over where the royals should all be and who should be with the, Then Charles tests positive. “I see,” the queen says into a telephone receiver. (I wonder if the queen uses a mobile phone? Will the 2020 episodes still have QEII holding a land line to her face?) There’ll be discussions over whether she should address the nation. “At a time like this they need you, ma’am,” someone will tell her. Boris will get sick of course, go into hospital, end up in ICU. Lizzie will have that strained, torn look on her face as she hears the news. Then he survives (same torn look on her face when she hears probably). She’ll be upset about missing her Easter duties but will give her touching Easter address. I guess eventually the numbers will start to get better too. Fewer people will die. Everyone will be cautiously optimistic. Perhaps the Queen will have to stay isolated for longer. Forever?
The episode will have that heavy feeling of the London smog episode or mining town landslide episode. Shit, a lot of bad stuff happens over 60 odd years does’t it? Ever since I started seeing COVID-19 as an episode of The Crown all news out of England appears to me as a part of the episode - it really is delightful. But I also started to think about the Crown episodes that the past decade would inspire. Terrorist attacks in London, Brexit, the Scottish referendum perhaps, Harry and Megan (can't wait for that one), some personal ones I could not foresee. Ugh. I hope this period of self isolation is giving her maj a well earned break. Girlfriend turned 94 on Tuesday, lockdown is probably the nicest thing that could have happened to her. Happy birthday QEII, stay safe.
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