Monday, August 8, 2016

Let's talk about Lenny (AM)

A few weeks ago K and I were accused by a longtime reader of racial homogeneity when it came to hunks. I was quick to point out that our hunk exploration has travelled from whitey world to South America and Asia but even I can't deny that we have a pretty anglocentric hunk radar. And although I think the Machine is partly to blame it's important to take responsibility for ones failings. 

But, on the Machine can we just consider Hollywood offerings of racial diversity? As far as black men go we have the likes of Morgan Freeman (too old), Will Smith (too Tom Cruise), Kevin Hart (I don't really know who this guy is). They just will not serve up to young-middle aged hunk that is handsome, smiley yet brooding, heroic and in more than one or two movies before the powers-that-be decide to dump him from the rotation probably because he's getting too popular for a black man. Asian men are always too action hero or too wacky. And basically that brings us to the end of Hollywood's racial diversity.  Still there's more to hunks than Hollywood so I think it's important to acknowledge that K and I could be doing more to create a more diverse hunk pallette. I guess the problem is that we are lazy. Which is pretty sad when you consider our passion for hunks and our disappointment in the hunks on offer in modern times.

And so after the accusation of our racism K and I had a little text conversation back and forth about black hunks in the middle of which k went to bed, leaving me to spend half the night thinking about where to find a more diverse field of hunks. I was left without any ideas until I opened Instagram the next day and literally the first picture of Lenny Kravitz in Lenny Kravitz's Instagram feed and my very first thought was, "Gee Lenny is pretty hot. Maybe he's a hunk. Maybe I should put that to K." But then doubt struck me "Maybe I'm living in the nineties. He does have that weird overt sexual thing I usually find repulsive. And yet..." Still I felt I needed more time to assess my true feelings about Lenny. And I am not lying or exaggerating or taking poetic license when I tell you that just a couple of hours later I received this message from K:

And K doesn't even follow Lenny Kravitz on Instagram. She just came to that conclusion on her own. And like that, it was as if the gods had spoken. Not that there was the answer and Lenny was undoubtedly a hunk, but suddenly our eyes were open.

Now as I mentioned Lenny has that weird overly and overtly sexual thing going on that I would usually be repulsed by, but somehow it kind of works on him, and it kind of got me thinking that maybe he has a bit of he creepy/sexy vibe going on. Like his soul brother Prince. I mean it kind of makes sense. Lenny Kravitz is 52 years old and wears leather pants and open shirts, but somehow here are K and I thinking about him as a bona fide hunk? I read on the internet that Lenny said "a part of him died when he learned of Prince's death." And I know he feels. But what I'm also wondering is whether a part of Prince lives on. In Lenny!*

You know what else I dig about him? He's half African-American and half Russian Jew. Which means that we squeeze two races into one hunk! Just jokes. I love it that any kind of Russian Jew could produce this:

I am not talking about Lenny today to add diversity to the Miss Soft Crab hunk collective, I'm talking about Lenny because there is no thing I love doing more than exploring  hunks and no place I love doing it more than right here, with you guys. Lenny, I'm just saying. 

*Let me make it crystal clear that I don't think that Prince and Lenny are in the same league of creepy/sexy or awesomeness, but I wonder if they have been drinking from the same fountain of creepy sexy, y'know? 


  1. African American russian Jew ( which surely means some Mongolian genes as well as Russia was swept by Mongolian hordes) what a diversity package in one

  2. I think there's better hunk choices among Latino actors. I vote for Gael García Bernal for one. Even though he's a bit short.

  3. H! The Misses Soft Crab love Gael! He was a hunk of the month