Where the hell are you going to put your ducks indeed?! You know to me it kind of sounds like a metaphor for that labyrinthine duck vagina Isabella Rossellini taught us about on Friday. But more pertinent to you.
I have to say that commenters "Sarah" and Cloudcontrol make some good points. When I first read your post my immediate reaction was that near the TV was definitely the goer. And I like CC's idea of them looking like they are about to fly out the window. But "Sarah"'s suction cup window idea is kind of adorable too. And you aren't getting Graham to put blinds up on that window, right? Whoever the fuck Graham is.
But to that thing you tried to hide up there in the first paragraph. Remember the other week you told me that you ate cream on apple and I was all "on raw apple, that is such a lame excuse to eat cream" and you were all "no, cooked apple" and I was all, "oh, that's totes legit" and then I felt bad for accusing you of such a thing. Well after that golden syrup in ramekin declaration I am withdrawing all bad feeling from accusing you of eating cream on raw apple.
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