A new look (AM)

Every morning for the last week and a half I've looked at this Andy Wathol painting of Dolly Parton and wondered how I can get this aesthetic into my look for the day.

I don't want a purple face and pink hair obviously, I just want to somehow capture what I love about this picture. The colours, the abundant hair, Dolly.

When I was at the Andy Warhol and Ai Weiwei exhibition and saw this painting I was sitting down in another room and looked behind me and high on a peach coloured wall were these two pictures of Dolly. Together they were really beautiful but I guess it was this one that really captured my attention. Or do I just think that because this is the one sold in postcard form? No I'm pretty sure I loved this one the best.

Needless to say I have not yet figured out how to embody this aesthetic. I think I'd probably need to make my hair big and curly and I probably need to wear some foundation that gives me really smooth beautiful skin. Then I probably need to wear some great coloured lipstick and eye makeup. And I probably need to work these colours into my outfit. Especially that pink

I think we all know that these are things are things I would just never do, not on some regular morning where my outings will most likely involve a school drop-off, getting a coffee down the street and a grocery shop. But I can't stop looking at her and wondering if there is another way. Right now I feel like this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen and I won't rest until I find a lazy way to embody it. Or get distracted by something else.

Miss Soft Crab assorted (PM)

Maxi pads in all the toilets! Wow! That's private healthcare for you!

You know what I'm thinking about nearly non-stop?! This blush-coloured Cheap Monday coat I picked up for $50 on the weekend.

It's true that I was already pretty well sorted for coats. And it's true that I don't believe you should buy something just because it is on mega sale. But it is also true that I am so attracted to this colour at the moment I could not resist. It's also true that just because I believe that thing about not buying things just because they are on mega sale doesn't mean I can always live by it. Finally, and perhaps truest of all is that I love to be warm and my passion for wearing doonas in public is second only to my passion for hot chips. And hunks. And sweet clothes. So now I am the delighted owner of a long pink puffer. 

The nail tutorial (PM)

But shit mate, they look so cute! Obviously I wasn't the one that had to sit around, immobile and with a baby to care for, waiting for the paint to dry but heck, the cuteness of the final product has me thinking that maybe it's worth it.

As for me, my nails are kind of stumpy and nail polish doesn't look that great on them, so I steer clear of it mostly and therefore will never have to face this dilemma. The only thing that makes me want to wear nail polish is so my hands will look more like my Mum's hands. 

Hear me out. 

Lately, I've caught the odd glimpse of my hands and thought wow, they look just like I remember Mum's hands looking when I was little. And I don't know about you people but I LOVED my Mum's hands when I was little. Still do, in fact. They were always holding nice things like snacks or tissues, and they were the things she used when she did all that soothing head patting when I was sick and hand holding when I was crossing the street. And they always had nail polish on them. The pearly kind, that was favoured by women in the 1980s. Still do, in fact. 

Nowadays, when I see my own hands looking like hers all those memories come to me and it instantly makes me feel good. Instantly! And sometimes I think that if I put pearly nail polish on them then the resemblance would be even greater and I would feel great all the time. But then I think I would have pearly nail polish on my hands and that doesn't seem so appealing. 

Anyway Mate, maybe you should think about the magical memories that may be forming in Baby's mind when you have cute nails. Maybe having cute nails makes you a better parent?

The nail tutorial (AM)

A while ago I had this nail polish concept I wanted to try out with a new dress. Well, I had a colour concept and wondered what I could do with it on my nails. Then I remembered that Frandonna had told me about this nail website she looks at and how she does great things on her nails. And I thought about how people are always telling me to watch beauty tutorials on YouTube. Putting that in writing I'm also wondering if they are trying to tell me something about my grooming habits, but let's leave that to another day. Anyway, these thoughts all lead me to one other thought: "Hells yeah, next time I have some Baby-free time that does not need to be filled with cleaning,  blogging, working or sleeping I'm going to learn how to do fancy nails!" Then I chastised myself for a while: "Gee J, why you so shallow, you gonna waste free time on your nails. You disgust me! Write, read, knit, do something productive!" So I put the nail idea out of my head and learnt neither how to do fancy nails nor spend time bettering myself.

And then, just the other day some free time came upon me. And I used it in a bunch of ways. I knitted, read, wrote and then, then I decided I could paint my nails. You see days before that I had been wearing some pink nail polish that had started flaking from the base of my nails and I thought, "Hey, this reverse moon phenomenon that is probably already passe may be onto something. This looks cute!" And so with this free time I decided to reverse moon my nails. First I was going to use two shades of pink, but after reading a tutorial "by" Heidi Klum I decided to go for navy and light green.

Let me give you a run down of how it works.

1. Paint light colour on nails two times. Wait half an hour.

2. Put semicircle sticker on bottom of nail paint dark colour on. Two times.

3. Wait 10 minutes. Remove stickers.

4. Woila!

Sounds simple right. Well, technically it is. But do you know how boring waiting half an hour is? Do you know what it's like when your baby waits up while you are trying some new shit with your nails? Somehow I managed to drop the polish brush and get navy nail polish everywhere. I've never done that before. I blame the fancy nails.



And. Do you know how long it takes four coats of nail polish to dry? From what I can tell, forever.

Sure, I could remove the stickers. And sure my nails did look pretty damn sweet, but every time my nails brushed or knocked a thing the polish smudged. In the end I had to remove it all. Well. I may not have finished the day with hot nails, but at least I gave it a shot, and now I know I don't have to waste time on nail polish tutorials any more. 

Things I don't care for (PM)

Oh, um, this is awkward. Because the phrase colourways doesn't really bug me that much. I mean, certainly if I heard a person use it in coversation like commenter Jo mentioned after K's morning post I would want to punch them in the face. But luckily I am pretty discerning with who I have conversations with. Though, sure, sometimes you can't avoid talking to deebs. BUT my understanding is that colourways doesn't just mean the same thing in different colours, though that's part of it. I think that if you are an actual designer doing a range that colourways really is more about differnt sets of colours that may be used in a full range of products. You know? Ok, I am not describing  this well at all. But I am not a designer or anything like it. I just know that it is used professionally and it makes sense. Still if you are in a shop and someone is showing you a thing in a different colour then they may as well just say different colours. I mean, in we all know what different colours means, right?.

But just because I don't hate the word colourways doesn't mean I am taking the moral highroad. I mean, there are heaps of things I hate, kind of unnecessarily. Like, I hate it when people say 'whilst' and 'amongst' instead of 'while' and 'among'. And when people say 'myself' instead of 'me' it drives me bonkers to the point of distraction. Seriously. I hate it. I hate it.

Thank god the sun is shining outside, cause otherwise I may have to carry this rage inside me all day long. Ugh.

Acrostic Monday (PM)

Nice to see you again, acrostic Monday!

Petal of violet

Interior of fig

No other colour's blush 

Knows my heart more.

Acrostic Monday (AM)

                                                My heart may belongs to blue. But

                                                 I have room in my heart for others

                                                No, mint, you could never replace navy

                                                Truth is as a colour your delighful, as a herb, sublime

It's cool (AM)

If you've been here before, I don't have to tell you that we have a pretty tenuous grasp on quality writing, and shit you guys it's been over 30 degrees for days now. That means that: a) my house is really hot; and b) I have not done any productive supermarket shopping because I can't figure out what to eat in this heat. Therefore, a+b=I am so hot and hungry. All I can think of is eating and cooling. In the interest of that, I have this for us all:

Just some shades I created using a really great program called Paint. HAHA. I hate you, Paint, but thanks for allowing me these cooling colours. Don't you think it is a little bit mind-bending how visuals can just change your feeling. Although I wish I'd thought about this yesterday when I went for a run in the stupid heat. I think thinking of things like this may have helped:

Oh yeah.

Don't thank me. Just enjoy it.

Friday, I've got springtime on my mind (AM)

I think that it would be fair to say that this winter really has been a winter. It has been cold and wet. And sometimes cold and sunny. I'm not complaining. No way. A season that acts the way a season is meant to! I respect that. And I know it is only early August and there 3 more official weeks of winter and probably 6 more unofficial ones, but gee, all that sunshine last week really whet my spring fashion appetite. The killer of it is that the cold, sunny days - though lovely, really I am not complaining, just observing - they give me a taste for spring, but you still got to rug up. So in my mind I'm already fantasising about the outfits I will bust out as soon as I can, even though in reality those outfits are months away. Yeah, I run cold and I'll be wearing jumpers and socks for what feels like ever.

Some of the things I can not stop thinking about wearing include:

T-shirts. God I love t-shirts. I just fantasise about wearing t-shirts with jeans all the time. And when I really let myself go, I imagine wearing t-shirts with shorts! I don't even like wearing shorts that much but I just like to imagine it because it means that it would be so warm.

You know what else I want to wear? Shirts. 

Oh man, I've got this one floral shirt that saw about 15 minutes of daylight the other day. All my poor pretty shirts have been stuck under jumpers for so long, they've probably got rickets.

How about shoes that aren't boots.




Oh yeah baby. A shoe that sits right on my foot without socks or stockings. Shut up!

And how about colours! Shit!

Colours. I mean, I know I was all "Navy is the colour for me!" And "Monochrome for life!" and I still feel that way, but imagine wearing some other colours, just once in a while, you know. Ooooh, colours, I'm gonna wear you so good come springtime!

Sometimes you just know (PM)

No topic better illustrates the differences between the two halves of the crab than this.

As J has gone deeper and deeper into navy (as well she should, it's perfect for her), I've wandered aimlessly through all the shades like a demented Rainbow Brite looking for a colour that will give me just some of what J has with navy blue.

And I never get any closer.

I feel like the little bird in Are you my mother? looking for my colour in all the wrong places and finding nothing but a bunch of adorable illustrated animals (goddamn that book is adorable, I feel like reading it right now - go read it if you haven't already!). Sure, I have a rich colourful wardrobe life, but I want that deep connection that comes when you build a life with a single colour.

Where are you colour? Will I ever find you?

: (

Sometimes you just know (AM)

When LB and I started going out I thought we were onto something pretty good. Obviously I was all falling in love and shit, so maybe it doesn't mean much, but at the time, after the initial early-relationship anxiety ,I felt pretty confident we would stay together for a while. Then there came a point when I realised that we could stay together forever. Now, 9 and a half years is not forever, by any stretch of the imagination, but you gotta start somewhere, right?

Recently, I have been starting to feel the same way about navy.

Blue has always been a favourite colour and I have always worn quite a lot of it. My eyes are blues, so I guess it suits me based on that, but is it a chicken and egg scenario? Do my eyes like it because I look good in it, or do I look good in it... nah, I guess that doesn't really work. Who knows, I just like blue in a whole bunch of shades, but lately I just can't get me enough navy. 

In my wardrobe I want everything to be navy. All my fashion fantasies are based in navy. Is that because it is so hot right now? I don't know, but I worry about it. 

Anyway, on the weekend I saw this girl wearing a pair of red Converse Chuck Taylor All Stars with a pair of jeans and this red and navy top. The look was really cute and I wondered if I shouldn't get myself a pair of navy All Stars given I don't have a simple runner at the moment and I often long for one. 

 Of course I should get these.

But the thought did raise the question, "Has this navy obsession gone too far?" And the other question "Will all this navy one day sit in my closet like so many forgotten things that sit in my closet forgotten?" And when I really started to ask the questions I felt that I was seeing things clearly for the first time!

Navy, you are the blue for me! There will always be place in my heart and wardrobe for all the blues, but navy, boy, when I look at you, all other blues just fall away. I love you, navy, and I think it's going to last. You and me navy. We can make it!

TGIF (PM)

Sorry to hear that you woke up at 5am. But lucky you found some amusement this week.

Today I woke at the respectable hour of 7am but I have had a bunch of mildly stressful and annoying things happening this week so it's like metaphorically I was waking at 5am everyday. If you know what I mean. You don't? Well screw you! Jokies. Oh no. This isn't going well at all.

Anyway this stressful week has meant my eyes were pretty much closed to all things amusing. The one amusing thing I actually did see this week is the new Die Antwoord video, thanks to Russeth. I love Die Antwoord. The clip is really pretty too. The beautiful colours. You may like to keep in mind that Yolandi and Ninja are doing it in real life. They have a child together.

TGIF!

Haiku Thursday (AM)

DIAMOND JUBILEE EDITION

QEII

Sixty queen years

Word to you and your mother

May she rest in peace.

Queen Mother

Is it strange, you Maj,

For your mum's title to change

And be about you?

How does she do it?

QEII somehow

Makes beige look warm, appealing

Good beige costs money

Haiku Thursday (AM)

 

YELLOW!
So effing yellow,

Turmeric, making yellow

All over. YELLOW!

Mouse

I

The mouse in my house 

Doesn't seem to eat my food

Doesn't crap around

II

The mouse in my house

Is kind of cute, but come on

I can see you, guy

III

The mouse in my house

Tiny, with large, sweet ears

Still...wish he'd fuck off

Haiku Thursday (PM)

Autumn 

I 

Of all the seasons 

Autumn is one of the best 

Makes top three, mos def

II 

Lasagne gets made 

The best season for dressing 

Red wine tastes delic 

III 

Colours of autumn 

Are spoken of most fondly 

Because they're lovely

Winning combos (AM)

You know what I love? Things that are great and then get even better when paired with another great thing. You know what I mean. Winning combinations. I'm not talking about those things you always think of together, like Joel and Ethan Cohen or salt and vinegar, I mean those things you think of as awesome in their own right but then when paired with something else awesome you think SHAZAM! Winning combo!

Here are some of my favourites combos:

Grated carrot and grated cheese. Now both of these things I love on there own and in all sorts of combinations but when you put these babies together magic happens. I am not talking about carrot and cheese any old way, I am talking about grated carrot and grated cheese. In a sandwich, in a wrap, in a taco, I don't care how you have it but when you put these grated guys together and those long thin strips start to mingle and tangle, oh yeah baby, they get together in loving harmony and it is a goddamn taste and texture sensation. I'm talking juicy, crunchy, creamy, salty, sweet. It's fucking beautiful.

You know what else I love? Blue and red together. These are two of my favourite colours. Look, I pretty much love all the colours when they are done right, but blue and red are really up there for me. Blue especially, it speaks to me. And I think all shades look good with red. Navy, pale, bright. But bright blue and bright red I love above all the combos. It is so fresh on my eyes. I effing love it.

Once I started thinking about winning combos I started seeing them everywhere. Like, I love David Bowie. Heaps. Who doesn't right? And I am digging on Queen more and more. Sure maybe it's because of this documentary that was on TV recently but maybe it's because of all those killer tracks.

I also kind of love Freddie Mercury. When else but in the olden days could a man with such a massive overbite become a super star. And when are these two powerhouses of Bowie and Queen finer than in Under Pressure.* Winning combo. My ears thank you!



*Maybe they have finer moments, I mean how good is Bowie? How do you chose a best track? But this one is such a good one.

Haiku Thursday (PM)

(AM Haiku, right here)

Rainbow Haiku

I

Blue. You're not my best

Colour. But you're a shit-hot

Joni Mitchell song

II

Yellow. Bananas!

Are good. But brown are better.

Banana cake, y'all!

III

Pink. Hey, girl. In my

Imagination, you taste

Just like musk lifesavers.

IV
Black. The hottest shade.
I bet you taste like making
Out. Yeah you would. Hot.