An open letter to the universe (AM)

Dear Universe,

I noticed that my hair looks really good today and it just got me wondering, how come some days it looks good and other days when I do seemingly the exact same things it doesn’t look so good. I know drying time and humidity play a role but it just seems kind of random and unfair, or, as Baby says, it’s not fur.

I also noticed, while watching the tennis over the summer and someone decided to show a close up of Serena Williams’ thigh (WTF, patriarchy?!) that girlfriend has some cellulite.  That is totally not fur! If SeWil has it, what the hell hope is there for the rest of the world.

Also, Universe, I’ve been wondering how it is decided who wins Tattslotto? And is there any way we could work something out?

And while we’re talking, do you think you could help me out with finding some serious direction? Like, I want to do something interesting and challenging and, preferably, lucrative. Do you have any suggestions?

Also, could you just do me a solid and let me know if it is right of me to think things will basically just work out. I mean, right now things are fine and I assume that I can make some life choices and things will continue to be fine, is that cool Universe, are things going to be fine?

Thanks, Universe.

Love

J