Monday, June 30, 2014

The c-word (AM)

I should warn sensitive readers that when I say 'the c word' I'm not being cute about it, like it means cabbage or something. As in "don't say the c-word or Baby won't touch his dinner, he hates cabbage". I don't mean cancer or colonoscopy or cask wine. No I mean the word that Biz can't say and instead says "see you next Tuesday", the word cunt. So if you have delicate sensibility stop reading, cause I may use the word again. Not a lot but it may come up. 

You know sometimes you'll read about how many times a politician says a certain word in a speech? Or, for example, how Tony Abbott used to say so many words a minute in opposition and now he says only so many words per minute as prime minister? Well I would be interested if someone did a similar assessment on my speech but instead of assessing my words per minute or how often I say "budget emergency" (never) or some other bullshit phrase, they would assess how often I say cunt now as opposed to when Abbott was in opposition. I'm pretty sure it's a lot more. 

There was a time when I used to say it frequently, very frequently. I've always been a swearer,  big time. Big time. But I never really said cunt until I was 18 or 19 or so and then you couldn't stop me! It was a really effective word for me at the time and I embraced it like a puppy with a bone, but time went on, I matured, my life changed. I'm a mother for fuck's sake I have to watch my language. And that was the status quo for a long time. I was just a mild user of the word. And then something changed. Government, I guess. Now I use the word all the time again. 

Here's my current estimate: Let's say I hear radio news three times a day and watch it on TV once a day. Abbot is probably on all those bulletins every second day at least saying something like "well fuck the high court I'm going to pay for the chaplaincy program anyway" (not a direct quote). And if it's not him it's Hockey or Scott Morrison. So I'd estimate 4 news items a day 3-4 days a week, I'm probably declaring "cunt"  at least 15 times a week. But I gotta tell ya, it feels like a lot more than that. So I'd like a professional assessment. Maybe a graph.


I'd also like to know how the fuck I am meant to bring up clean mouthed little boys in this political climate?! Seriously. How the fuck? 

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