As you probably know, I spent part of the hiatus having a baby and the rest of it keeping the baby alive. So you can imagine, the world has changed a lot for me. (Mate, your were spot on when you said this and also OMG, it hadn't sunk in that you blogged from the labour ward when Newbie was born, and what that means. Far out.)
But as they say, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Even though the last month has been a goddamn thunderstorm of transformation and change and terror and the like, an aspect of my old life has endured. Not just endured, it's clung on for dear life, like those people who the Doctors are sure will die when you turn their life support off and then the family makes the difficult decision to do that but then when they switch the machines off the people live! They live!
That thing is my hair, you guys. It's a classic Miss Soft Crab preoccupation and even though there is a tiny crab in my life these days, it has only become more intense.
Pregnancy was kind to my hair. It became thick and awesome and would basically look good without me having to do anything. I knew it was a temporary state, so I decided to just enjoy it while it lasted. And it's not like as soon as the baby was born my hair started to look lank and thin again. No. The problem was that as soon as the baby was born I realised that I hadn't made it to the hairdresser to get a fringe trim before the baby was born. It was one of only two things on my list of things to do before I have a baby! The other was go to the movies a lot, which I did (well, I went twice). But the baby came early. I was caught off guard. So my fringe just grew and grew.
A too-long fringe is highly annoying, and normally culminates in me waking up one morning, thinking I can't take it anymore and then arranging to get a haircut that very same day. That day arrived about 2 days after the baby was born. But when you've just had a baby, you can' t just go and do things because you decide you can't take it anymore. So for three weeks I felt infuriated by my fringe during most every minute of every hour of the day. And because of new baby, I was awake for quite a considerable number of those minutes and hours. But how the hell would I ever find the time to get a fringe trim? I really couldn't see the way forward. I started pinning it back with bobby pins and wearing a head scarf a couple of times (not that I know how to do that) but that just made me paranoid that I looked really terrible and was 'letting myself go'. It's a confusing time, the first few weeks.
Anyway, after crying on the phone to my Mum and in all the rooms in the house to Appleheart, we all decided that I had to get a haircut as a matter of priority.
I made an appointment at a local place which turned out to be very cute. The hairdresser was very sweet and her business is a one-man-band. She had excellent hair and when I saw that, I relaxed into the chair knowing that everything would be alright.
I relaxed a little too much I think, because I didn't really explain what I wanted and the haircut she gave me has a few too many layers in it I think. And I'm worried that as my pregnancy hair starts to fall out, this haircut will look worse and worse.
But it doesn't matter. I'm pretty sure that even if the haircut was great, I would still spend a lot of time thinking about my hair. Worrying about how it will look as it falls out. Worrying about whether it will change, which is something that can happen what with all the baby hormones. I would still be preoccupied with my hair because I am half of Miss Soft Crab and that's what we do. Even when everything changes. That doesn't.